So, Wired UK has been out for about a month. Thanks to the craptastic Technorati feed that I track to regurgitate news onto here and act like it's new, I'm just now seeing this.

Wired UK's Top 10 Predictions for the Future: 9 - Teledildonics (2018)

Yes. According to Wired, Teledildonics exists as of 2018. So, I hereby declare myself to exist in 2018. As a courtesy to the rest of you fucking cave dwellers, I will extend 2018 to also be anything that exists in the 5 ft. around me.

What 2018 currently has to offer: This cat, a fuzzy pink ball, a macbook power adapter, one of my shoes, and teledildonics.

Aren't you excited about the future now?

Update: New come-on line - "Hey, wanna exist in 2018?" (emphasis random)