Futurologist Predicts BoobPod

I originally picked this up on Ananova, but as with everything on Ananova, I wasn't really sure it was true. However, plugging in "bt technologies mp3 breast implant" to google brought up the paper that mentions it. According to a BT Futurologist (I want that job. "I predict... BIOLUMINESCENT ICE CREAM!"), one of the things we could look forward to in the future is implants that serve multiple purposes, replacing items we usually carry with items that go everywhere because they're in us. As an example, he mentions breast implants with MP3 players in them. ("Mammory Memory". God I love academic humor.)

pause for everyone to make Tune In Tokyo jokes

Now, I'm all for implants. The second I get the $500 or so free for a nice HiTag RFID with 2k storage and crypt and a reader, you can bet your ass I'm getting me an RFID implant. However, a BoobPod? This sort of reminds me of Jude Law as the robowhore in AI (best part of the movie O M G). Just slap some titties and there's the Barry White. It's strangely romantic.

Ok, no it's not.

Originally written by Isabelle Pavlova for mmorgy.com.

Though he's only been in Second Life 3 months, qDot Bunnyhug has already managed to revolutionize sex interaction in Second Life. As the founder of Nonpolynomial Labs, by day he creates interaction projects such as the LifeCycle, which allows SL Inhabitants to ride through the world on virtual vehicles propeled by a real exercise bike. By night, he is the head geek in charge at Slashdong, a site dedicated to the best in DIY Sex Toys and Teledildonics, including creating the first mechanism to control real life sex toys through Second Life. I sat down with him for a chat about his projects in SL so far, and his plans for the future.

MMOrgy: So tell us about your sex projects for SL so far.

qDot Bunnyhug: Well, the reason I joined Second Life in the first place was to create a Teledildonics interface for it. Surprisingly, that only took a couple of weeks. Basically, I used the XML-RPC capabilities of the world to relay information back and forth between the client's computer and the world. This information allows people in world to set the force feedback speed of a controller on that user's machine. I have also created a controller known as the SeXBox that has jacks for sex toys, triggered off of the force feedback motors. So, users can hook up the SeXBox to their computer, make sure feedback works, and then let others control that feedback speed. Put all that together, and you have a virtual teledildonics service.

MMOrgy: Why come to SL for that, versus supporting video and audio first?

qDot Bunnyhug: Heh, well, the greatest thing about Second Life is the development rampup is virtually nil, assuming you've got some prior programming experience. The language, though it has it's quirks, is simple enough to be learned in under a week. After that, using the XML-RPC and email capabilties, you've got access to a world full of useres and content. Sure, it may be a little slow, but the fact that I could bring up the Second Life project in under 2 weeks from getting my account is really a testament to what can be done in the world. Compare this to the amount of time it's going to take to put together an easy to use, cross-platform teledildonics service with video and audio capabilties. It's nice to have something up and working that fast.

After that, it's all about the features of the world. Sure, my hardware allows other to control real life sex toys, but those others could be damn near anything, since the world offers almost infinite avatar customization. It lets people play out their fetishes the way they want, which really adds something to the online sex experience as a whole.

MMOrgy: So, the big question then: How was the testing phase? :)

qDot Bunnyhug: Well, a good sex toy inventor never fucks and tells (or, actually, they do, but, well... nevermind), so let's just say I'm aware that it is fully functioning. :)

MMOrgy: Are you aware of anyone else in Second Life who has built your project?

qDot Bunnyhug: Not as of yet. A surprisingly small number of people seem to be interested in soldering bare wires to things that will later go near their more... sensitive areas. I know of at least a few people who have built the SeXBox controller though, so it can be reproduced. Maybe one of these people will hit Second Life soon. Message me if you do!

MMOrgy: Any plans to sell it?

qDot Bunnyhug: As soon as we get a version that's stable and consistent, yes, we are definitely interested in selling the finished product. We're actually interested in the use of Second Life and other MMO currancy systems as payment forms for "real" products, too. Unlike Credit Cards and other payment systems, you don't have to worry about privacy, chargebacks, and transaction fees. However, since the money holds no real value except in the minds and wallets of the inhabitants of the world, the market can fluctuate rather wildly at a whim, meaning if you don't sell off quickly and readjust your prices to the market, you could lose money. It's a risky situation, but it brings up some interesting economic points. However, I digress, I'm sure your readers probably don't find economics sexy.

MMOrgy: You'd be surprised. So what are your plans for the future?

qDot Bunnyhug: First off, I'm interested in getting things working a little better than in the first version of the sex toy control project. That was my first project on Second Life ever, and it shows. You can only change speed with a frequency of around 3 seconds per change, which is obviously very slow. I've got a few different ideas in mind to speed this up.

I'm also working with Kyrah Abbatoir on interactive BDSM toys for Second Life. There's been a few computer controlled BDSM toys around, such as the Utopex Spanker, but no one has really done much with the idea of interactive, remote controlled bondage yet. Of course, it's a pretty daunting area to be dealing with, but it's fun nonetheless.

MMOrgy: Sounds cool! Thanks for your time, and I look forward to your new projects!

qDot Bunnyhug: No problem! Thanks!

Originally written by Isabelle Pavlova for mmorgy.com

MMOs are becoming quite the rage these days. From the humble beginnings of MUDs in the late 70's to the 3+ million subscriber levels of games like World of Warcraft today, we've seen online interactive gaming come a long, long way. With that progress has come new social paradigms that can only be found in the virtual worlds we have created.

That being said, sex in virtual worlds is useless, at least, in terms of the world itself. You will not level up by fucking (unless you're playing Sociolotron, of course). You will not gain new items automatically by hitting the buttons in such a way that it makes a crude cunnilingus animation out of what was supposed to be a dance. Sex is the act of reproduction, and as of now, very few games actually offer that feature. (I eagerly await many a heated email from Sociolotron players)

Why do we have sex in games? Simple, it's part of our nature, and MMOs are all about human nature and creativity. We bring to the world the things we are familiar with, our hopes and dreams, the things we wish were possible but are sadly not because of money, time, or the laws of physics. Combine this with the fact that every month some new feature comes out that makes these worlds a little more immersive, a little more real, and soon youve created a playground where people can lose themselves, experiment, and learn new things all in front of their computer screen. MMOs allow us to act out events without fear of being caught publically or not being able to stop it if we don't like it. The power switch to your PC or console is one of the safest "safe words" you can have.

One click, and it's over (at least, until you log on again. :) ).

Now, a lot of people wonder why someone would have sex in a game instead of just using the freely available, easy-to-use video/audio conferencing available. If you can see and hear the real person, what's left?

If you're in a long-distance relationship, in-world sex can be a way to change things up a bit. You know it's the same person on the other end, and that context adds amazing things to the value of the world.

If you're low on bandwidth and too poor for long distance, text may be all you have. Why sit in a messanger when you can play in a prebuilt, scripted world that will add to the experience?

For instance, look at our header graphic. People are turned on by different things. Men like to play as women. Women like to play as men. Both of them like to play as vampires, furries, masters, slaves, doctors, patients, and a multitude of other roles. If you have software that will allow you to get deeper into those roles, why not use it?

So, just because MMOs don't require sex, it doesn't mean that it doesn't make them a better place, or a better experience for some users. That's why we're here, to let people know what they can find in these worlds and where they can find it. No more logging on and feeling sheepish 'cause you wanna know where the bordello is first. No more endless search through horrible shops finding implements for you and your fiancee who's 3000 miles away to have fun with. Just keep an eye on MMOrgy, and we'll keep you informed.

The Accujac, Robojac, and toys of Funways Marketing

And while we're at posting about autojackers, I just found out about this one from someone on our forums. Unforunatly, this looks like it's going to be a history lesson instead of a product annoucement, as most parts of their pages haven't been updated since 2003, and their order pages show 404's now.

Funways Marketing produced the AccuJac, RoboJac, RoboJil, and many other awesomely named machines and components. With all of the understated grace of a tackle box, you could carry around your dildo controller right next to all of your hunting equipment without anyone noticing!

Now, for all of my ribbing about design, they honestly had some really cool addons. The Piston Dildo was a somewhat crude but effective usage of air pressure for pumping purposes. They even ventured into the world of electrostim. They even beat Rent-A-Dildo to the refurbished toy idea!

Ah well, I always find out about the cool stuff way too late. I'll give their 800 number a call tomorrow and update this post if they're still alive.

The Ijaculator

The law of DIY building states:

For every ghetto ass hack you build, someone will build something ghettoer, and charge 5x as much

So now we find ourselves with the Ijaculator. This looks to be a toilet paper tube on a rocker base. To prepare, just stuff a latex glove in it, lube it up, and you're ready to go! All for only $300!

Yeah, that's right, $300. Nevermind that you can buy a Priceless for $179 (which should be discounted when you constantly advertise them on your page cough cough :) ), it comes works with the fleshlight which I can GUARENTEE feels a lot better than a waded up and lubed latex glove.

The final nail in the coffin has to be the billing. "Send $300 to (insert address here)!" In this day of credit cards and digital money transfer, I just don't think I'll be shipping a check to some random internet guy's house. I feel much better having 1's and 0's stolen than paper, it makes me feel more... techy.

Update: I just found out Fleshbot made this same rant a year ago. Well, at least there's a consensus.

via sexblo.gs